Drinking alcohol was a way for Michelle to suppress her emotions of grief, abandonment, disappointment and heartache. She noticed that when she was able to go out everything was associated with alcohol whether it was a yoga party or happy hour. Struggling with postpartum depression, there wasn’t enough time for Michelle to figure anything out. She would often wait until her children were asleep so she could drink to pass out. Her alcoholism ultimately put her in a hospital and led to child protective services looking in on her and her children. She knew she had a problem and she had to work on being there for the people she loved.
Having gone through treatment and now in recovery, Michelle can look back and see all the warning signs. She got so caught up in the shame. Today she follows a quote from AA — “Just for a day. I’m going to distract myself. I’m going to give myself the best shot. Today I’m going to do it for today.” She knows that if she keeps that mindset the urge will go away as quickly as it comes.
Today she has found herself and educated herself by reading books and searching for ways that can help fuel her mind. She can do every single thing that she used to do but now she can remember what she did and have the best time doing it. She lives her life of sobriety by seeking her truth and understanding that no one is ever safe from this disease. She knows that the person with the most sobriety time is the person who woke up first.