When Nick was using drugs he felt like the man. He never wanted to live another day in his life without feeling like that. All of his anxiety was suddenly gone. He could talk to anyone. He could do anything. The thing was that he couldn’t stop. It lead him to do things he wasn’t proud of — stealing from his family or doing any number of illegal hustles so that he didn’t feel sick. The substance was so powerful and overwhelming that he didn’t have a choice. He had to do it.
At some point Nick knew that he wanted to get help. With tears in his eyes, he told his parents about his addiction and that he had a number for a rehab. At first, treatment was scary for Nick as he was off his pills and began withdrawal, but eventually he began to form a brotherhood in treatment. He can recall his roommate telling him to look into the mirror and to look at himself. He remembers seeing himself in the mirror and breaking down in tears as he didn’t recognize himself. It was a pivotal moment for Nick because it showed him how scary it was to not be able to recognize yourself. The tears he shed washed away some of his pain.
The biggest thing Nick was taught in treatment was the saying “you only have to change one thing and its everything.” At the time, he thought it was kind of overwhelming but for Nick it was 100% accurate. He believes treatment is an opportunity to completely change your life and that we all have the foundation of a successful person. Nick doesn’t know any successful addicts so taking a leap of faith towards recovery is a great start.