When Addiction Medication Stops Working…

Our addictions are funny things; that which is killing us is actually what saved our lives. If the things we do did not make us feel better, we would not be addicted to them. We are self medicating a misunderstood disease. There are no guidelines, no doctor’s orders, no warning signs or contraindications, just us and our medication of choice.

When Addiction Medication Stops Working…

When the time comes that our medication is no longer working, and we have run out of excuses to keep taking it, it is time to learn why we started to take it in the first place. It’s time to learn how to live without it. Some people manage to figure it out. Others come close, and live their lives in and out of recovery, never managing to grasp the severity of their problem. Far too many die trying to figure it out. The journey of recovery is indeed a second by second endeavor. One moment leads to minute, then a few, an hour, a day, a week, many weeks, then a year. A celebration ensues and there you are, back in the moment.

They say that the best chance at successful sobriety is to not think too far into the future. One day at a time is solid advice. Live in the moment is valid. Live and let live makes sense. I also believe that it is healthy and wise to take a peek into a potential future every now and then during your moment by moment existence in sobriety. I like to think things through. Maybe my training as a firefighter makes it impossible for me to trust the moment completely, being aware of imminent collapse, flashover, a patient breathing one moment and in cardiac arrest the next, an expectant mother with labor pains being transported peacefully to the maternity giving birth on Rt. 95 . . . yes, the future is definitely something I need to consider. I do not dwell there, but I do take a look quite often.

A Peek Into the Future

Changing the behaviors that drive our addictions is hard. If it were easy, everybody would do it. We, as human beings are wired to seek rewards, and pretty much follow a path that leads to that which soothes us. We need to override our nature when it comes time to tackle difficult problems, and overcoming addiction is about as difficult a problem we will encounter.

So, allow me the luxury of taking you into your future. I know that these dreams will become reality, ever for the most desperate among us. I know this, because I once was living second by second, afraid to think into my own future. Somewhere, deeply embedded in my subconscious lived a possibility that I might get well. Little by little that thought seeped into my reality, until the time came that I was able to allow it to become an idea, and eventually, reality.

If you are not yet able to believe it for yourself, allow yourself the luxury of believing me. You too can have what I have.

There will come a time when the people in your life no longer walk on eggshells around you, will invite you to their celebrations, trust you with their secrets and look to you for guidance. You will be one of the people who survived addiction. No longer will you have to endure the well-meaning but hesitant congratulations from people who do not fully understand the depth of your disease when they learn that you are newly sober. You will no longer live with the mistrust, disappointment and anger from others and at yourself that you have learned to accept. Your days will be free from thoughts of inadequacy.

Your spirit will be free.

You will be free.

_____

Read More from Michael Morse:

• Reasons to be Grateful This Holiday Season
• They said I can drink!