Signs of Codependency & Addiction (Impacts & Negative Effects)

What is Codependency?

Codependency defines a relationship in which one partner has extreme physical or emotional needs, and the other partner spends most of their time responding to those needs, often to the detriment of the codependent partner’s life, activities, and other relationships. Codependency can result in a difficult spiral in which the codependent partner cares for and enables the loved one’s challenges, making it easier for the loved one to maintain the challenging or destructive behaviors.

Codependency & Drug Abuse

Codependency does not necessarily occur with drug use, but it was first recognized in relation to family members of people struggling with alcohol use disorder.¹ Codependency is commonly found in those who have close relationships to people who struggle with addiction. It can manifest in multiple ways including the following:

• Partners who both misuse drugs
• Close adult family members or significant others using drugs
• Children of people who misuse drugs or struggle with addiction

The codependent partner in the relationship is not necessarily a spouse. Often, children of people who are addicted to drugs and alcohol become codependent, especially when an addiction has gone so far that the child feels the need to take on a caretaker role with the parent.

Negative Effects and Risks for the Codependent Partner

When a person is in a codependent relationship with someone who is misusing drugs, both individuals may experience multiple negative effects and even risks based on the situation. For example, studies indicate that there can be serious implications not only to the family dynamics surrounding codependent relationships, but also to the health of the codependent individual.² Some of these risks can include:²

• An increased risk of also developing addictions to substances, food, or gambling, for instance.
• A loss of relationships with those outside the codependent relationship.
• An inability to keep up with other responsibilities outside of the codependent relationship.

Codependency generally results in the individual working so hard to care for the addicted loved one that the codependent individual’s needs are neglected, which can also result in poor health, low self-esteem, depression, and other mental and physical consequences.

Negative Effects and Risks for the Addicted Partner

As for the person struggling with substance use, the codependent relationship can also have severe consequences on the addiction itself as well as on potential treatment outcomes. First and foremost, the codependent relationship serves as an enabling influence in the person’s life. The codependent person may want to help their loved one, but at the same time, they may subconsciously fear that the other person won’t need the codependent person any more if the addiction is resolved. This tends to thwart any truly effective attempts to get help, leaving the loved one continuing to struggle with addiction and with the physical and mental health risks it creates.

Research indicates that this factor can also be a risk if treatment is undertaken. Because the codependent partner feels dependent on the addiction to maintain the relationship, returning to the relationship as usual after treatment can actually increase the risk of relapse for the addicted partner.² For this reason, codependence should be considered as part of the individual’s treatment plan when the person enters a rehab program.

Codependency and Treatment for Drug Use

Because of the issues described above, when a person who is struggling with addiction is also in a codependent relationship, this should be taken into account for treatment. There are elements of research-based treatment programs that can help both partners in the codependent relationship. For example, research demonstrates that having addiction treatment professionals work with the addicted person’s family members to modify codependent behaviors can have lasting effects even after addiction treatment is completed.³

In more severe cases of codependency, it can be helpful for the codependent partner to seek their own treatment program. Psychiatric professionals can provide behavioral and personal therapy to improve the codependent individual’s self-image and ability to set goals, define needs, and draw boundaries that make it possible to have a stronger sense of self-worth, deeper emotional intimacy, and healthier relationships.

Drawing Boundaries

One of the most important elements of treating codependency in drug misuse is learning how to set boundaries. For both the person struggling with substance use and the codependent partner, setting boundaries can help to restore a healthier relationship and, in turn, make it more likely that both partners can recover from the challenges of a codependent, drug-using relationship.

Some of the steps in beginning to draw healthy boundaries include:

• Learning that having needs and preferences different from the loved one is OK.
• Defining personal emotions, rather than what “should” be felt.
• Setting limits on one’s own behavior as well as others’ behaviors.
• Being able to recognize and pursue one’s own needs rather than those of others.
• Respecting one’s own boundaries as well as the boundaries of others.

By learning to establish boundaries, the codependent person and the individual struggling with addiction can learn how to create a healthier relationship, making it more likely that treatment will have a positive outcome for both partners.